Split Personality

I've discovered something about myself recently. I have a pretty split personality. Half of me seek comfort; a home, with children and a partner and cooking and baking and laundry. I enjoy feeling taking care of, secure, safe. My childhood was quite crazy, i went through a lot and I don't think I got enough of that "safe" feeling that children crave. That half of my personallity is the child in me trying to get that back.

The other half thrives on adventure and craziness. I love feeling free and wild. I love motorcycle rides and impromptu vacations. I dive headfirst in relationships and end up regretting them. I seek a partner that is challenging and exciting. It's that part of me that wishes for an acting career.

My two halves hate each other. When I choose to act, the safe side of me worries about money. When I want to pick everything up and move cities, I realize that I own two pets, a lease and that I have a mother whom I would leave alone. When I find a perfect comforting secure partner, part of me wishes for adventure and freedom. I am never satisfied because I cannot pick which part of me is more me.

Lancaster, Ontario

I've been gone for a really long time peeps and for this I apologize. During my absence, the leaves turned all kinds of beautiful color and the temperature dropped significantly! But I was gone for a good reason, living out one of my dreams; being the lead in a horror movie. I spent a month living in a trailer, showering in quarters operated public showers and peeing in the woods. I am banged up all over from doing stunts and running through the woods in high heels and barely any clothing. And yet, I had the time of my life! I met amazing people and laughed everyday. I discovered so much about myself as a person and as an actress.

I would do it all over again even if someone were to warn me about the 28 consecutive days sleeping in a chilly damp trailer in the middle of a creepy trailer park. It was worth all the scratches, bruises, rug burn and runny nose.

I'll post some pics of my adventure soon!